The Best Ways Parents Can Communicate with Their Child’s Teachers

The Best Ways Parents Can Communicate with Their Child’s Teachers

Communication is the single most important thing you can do to offset or influence any obstacles or bumps in the road that may arise throughout your child’s school year. There are a number of reasons why parents may be hesitant to come to school and meet their child’s teacher(s). Sometimes, parents may be anticipating bad news or they feel their parenting is being questioned. The fact of the matter is that when parents are involved in their child’s school life, they’ve suddenly created one of the most powerful partnerships that could benefit their child.

I have had the pleasure of working with middle school children on a daily basis for nearly two decades. I know that for a parent to establish a strong connection with a teacher early on is crucial to forming a united front in which the child realizes that both his parent(s) and teacher are on the same nurturing team. This whole child approach pays major dividends sooner or later. Not to mention the astounding joy I witness from children when they are told they are doing a good job, but also the delight that parents showcase is equally as special!

Family-School Collaboration Focusing on Quality of Life for All

What is the most successful approach for making the connection?

In order for parents and teachers to be tuned into the same frequency and successfully make this connection happen, both parties must set aside any judgment and drawing of conclusions and rather focus on the best interests of the child. Ultimately, the most successful proactive approach for benefiting a child is getting to know the child. When both parents and teachers commit to this philosophy, a child feels loved, cared for, and better understood. This results in better behavior and overall success at school.

From the parents I’ve worked with over the years, who have expressed having a crisis with their child’s behavior at school or poor academic performance and not know how to effectively handle the issue, I respond by asking a question, “Did you meet with your child’s teacher yet about this matter?” The all-too-familiar response is either, “No,” or “Not yet.” This is often followed by questions such as, “Should I?” and “When do you think would be a good time to do that?”

One of the biggest concerns I have is when a problem arises and the parents are the first to jump to the rescue. This is where a child owning their problems and approaching the teacher as a first step teaches a child about accountability. If things don’t improve, then measures can be taken to move onto step two. Time to “Meet the Teachers!”

From my experiences, a number of parents are under the impression that no news from a teacher must mean that everything is going along fine and there aren’t any problems brewing. This can be true. However, the reality is that many teachers, especially in public schools, are responsible for over 100 students a day, especially secondary education teachers. Therefore, it can be difficult for teachers to respond when a homework assignment or two doesn’t get turned in.

“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.” ~George Bernard Shaw (Irish playwright, critic, polemicist and political activist

When is the best time to start the conversation?

If you are looking for the easiest way to strike up a conversation with your child’s teacher, I would highly recommend attending a Parent-Teacher Open House. Whether it is 5 minutes, 20 minutes or an hour, this will be time well spent. Consider it an investment into the connection you are building with you and your child.

If all of this is not possible due to various constraints in your life, try starting with an e-mail or a phone call to establish a line of communication. From there, if need be, you can set up a meeting with your child’s teacher(s) so you can get to know their classroom expectations. This will also allow you to provide insight to the teacher(s) on how your child best operates and discuss a plan to structure to help your child succeed. I would particularly recommend this for parents who have children that have historically struggled in specific aspects in their education, such as organization, motivation, writing, math and/or have special needs that the teacher(s) should be aware of.

Douglas Haddad, is an award-winning educator and best-selling author. You can go online or to a local bookstore and order his best-selling-book The Ultimate Guide to Raising Teens and Tweens: Strategies for Unlocking Your Child’s Full Potential, you will find specific strategies to help guide your child with time management, setting goals, and motivation to achieve greatness in their life. www.douglashaddad.com

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This post originally appeared on our March/April 2019 Magazine