From The Heart: Oh… the Surprises

My daughter, Kailee, recently told me she’s not sure if she wants to attend the University of North Florida like her big sister. One of her friends is going to college at the University of Central Florida, and she thinks she may want to check out that college as well. WOW, WOW, WOW…she’s thinking about her future! She has her own thoughts about her life!!! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! There was a time in her life when I didn’t think any of this would be even remotely possible.

True confessions here: I am not a great planner. Every year I vow to become a better planner, and every year I make only mild improvements. However, I’ve seen that even taking small steps towards a game plan does eventually get you closer to your goal. When PSN covered the PATH a few years ago, I didn’t have a “team” in place for Kailee. But I took what I learned from someone else’s path and tried to see what I could put together for her. While not perfect, it was simple and a good starting point. Recently, I was fortunate to be able to pull my daughter’s “team” (teachers, therapists, friends and family) together and do a PATH/STAR for her. It was an awesome experience, and I highly recommend it for all our children. Even if your child is just beginning school, this will help them create a goal/vision for where you see them, or they see themselves, in the future. It will help direct, guide and focus your goals. This is a HUGE help with lEP’s. It is a great planning tool. It is another step along “the path”, so to speak.

When we took our oldest daughter to college four years ago, we gave Kailee a tour around the campus as well. We also went and visited their college inclusion program and saw the apartments where the kids attending this program lived. Planting the idea in my daughter’s head that there might be a possibility of going to college someday has been a huge MOTIVATOR. HUGE. Kailee strives and pushes herself to do things because now she sees herself going to college.

My point to all of this is that I think even if you cannot do a PATH for your child, do have a plan or direction based on what their dreams and goals are. It helps move them and project them further and they might even surprise you. As I mentioned my plan was simple; all we did was suggest that she may go to college. We use that for helping her learn to button her pants, brush her hair, etc… After all, you can’t go to college, or live independently, if you can’t do certain things. It has even helped with simple cooking skills as well! As the old saying goes: The journey of 1000 miles begins with one single step.

Happy Planning

Chantai Snellgrove
Founder and Editorial Director
chantai@parentingspecialneeds.org

5 Things I Learned from This Issue

1. The difference between ABLE Account and Special Needs Trust.
2. IEP’s can’t be a “cookie-cutter” any longer.
3. Questions to consider in building independence.
4. Tips for wading through the vocational rehab waters.
5. Great tips for getting your finances in order.

Articles Mentioned in This Article

• Building Independence Through Self Awareness And Regulation
• Is the IEP Individualized or Cookie-Cutter?
• Taking Control of Your Family’s Finances Following a Divorce
• Able Account or Special Needs Trust: How to Decide?
• Where to Go if Your Child Needs a Job or Help with Post High School Education
• Mommy’s Timeout: Alaskan Mountains Matanuska Glacier
• Real Moms Share: Evana Sandusky

This post originally appeared on our January/February 2016 Magazine