PSN Issue
By: 
A.I can remember when I had to
question myself as I put
my 2 twins on 3 waiting lists when they were 8 years old. The social
worker on
the other end of the phone who was asking me questions, kept reassuring
me that
it was our duty to make sure that they were taken care of when we
couldn't do
it any longer. She pointed out that my training assisted me in coming
to the
realization that this would be the right thing to do.
However, it was not all that easy for my husband to get accustomed to.
He
balked at first and felt as if we were "dumping" them on someone else
eventually. He came to see the importance of having them placed in a
community
which would be an asset for them, and that they needed to feel a part
of
something that they could relate to.
In my opinion the guilt of placement sometimes overrides the logic
which is
needed to cope with what is inevitable. We are not going to be here
forever. It
is not fair to have family members take care of our children,
especially if
they are not equipped with the proper credentials and background or
experience.
I am not saying go willy nilly out into the world and don't investigate
group
home organizations. It's important to know where your child is going to
go. I
will tell you though that there are many wonderful organizations who
are
committed to helping this population of the intellectually disabled.
I want my children to have a purpose driven life. Just because they are
intellectually disabled does not mean that they cannot give something
to
society. A group home community along with a job which they can handle,
will
give them that.
Robin Newman
LCSW,PC, clinical social worker and
adjunct professor at Adelphi's Graduate School of Social Work. She also
has a
private practice. She is married with 2 special need children. Have a
question
about your relationship? Ask Robin. Send your questions to advice@parentingspecialneeds.org
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